The Freckles of Insecurity….How to Embrace Who You Were Meant to Be

Have you ever suffered from being insecure about something? Maybe it is something about your appearance or something about your ability to do a certain task in life? Has it interfered with how you face your day? Or maybe it just creeps up on certain days or during a time when you gather with others. I most certainly have…..in fact I have had MANY experiences with insecurity. One that sticks out in my head that I see everyday when I look in the mirror is my freckles. I remember going through Jr. High feeling so overwhelmed about them and how they scattered every part of my face. I would look at all my friends complexions and see nothing but pure perfection, gleaming skin, flawless in its appearance.  Even others who also had freckles,  seemed to have thiers cast upon their face in such a dainty way. Their freckles seemed to have an order of beauty to them. Mine looked like someone held a screen over my face and through dirt at it.  In fact, I have this one particular freckle that sits above my upper lip and everyone would try to rub it off or discreetly tell me I had something on my lip.  I felt so insecure with the markings that cast the surface of my appearance.

I will never forget the day I tried to get rid of them. I raided my mothers make up bag and coated my face in her Cover Girl Foundation. The smell of it took over my senses and in the reflection of the mirror stood a girl with a flawless complexion. I was amazed at how it took them away. Once I took a step back from the mirror and had a good look at myself…..I was in shock at how I now looked! My skin was a different colour and I looked nothing like my self. I felt awkward but yet satisfied that the freckles where no where to be seen. So I got up the next day for school and smeared the magic potion all over my face and headed on out the door. My skin felt so tight and uncomfortable but there was some confidence in knowing the freckles where gone. By the time I got to school that confidence was slowly fading away. I could feel the long stairs from people as to why I looked so different, my skin was no longer the only thing that felt uncomfortable. Finally someone got the nerve to ask me the question in a very direct way. “What the heck is wrong with your face Meredith!!!!” I honesty didn’t know what to say. I continued on with the uncomfortable feeling of everyone staring at me for about 2 periods ….I even felt the teacher had her concerns as to why I looked the way I did.  I finally went to the bathroom to try and get the potion off, it suddenly wasn’t so magical!!! So now I was in a real pickle….a freckled face that looks terrible with the magic eraser of perfection. Make up was suppose to make me look pretty and flawless but it did nothing but make me look even worse. I felt ashamed, embarrassed and defeated to the freckle attack that took over my appearance. The older I got the more that appeared, they not only scattered my face but began to pop up everywhere all over my body. They were never going to stop popping up and they most definitely were not going to go away. So the only thing to do was learn to love them. If Cindy Crawford could rock her mole….I was going to have to find a way to rock my freckles right? And let me tell you something, summertime with freckles was like a whole other battle in itself. The moment the sun would beat on my face the more prominent they became. They darkened and by the end of the summer I had a 20 more of them. There was no hiding them. It even got to the point that if the sun was shining in the winter and I was outside, they popped out like popping popcorn….I think they even made the same sound.  It seemed the sun was my freckle enemy……the microwave to my pop freckles.

Insecurities are a lot like freckles, they pop up and we try to cover them up. Sometimes we put that Cover Girl foundation on and we no longer look like our selves because of it. Did  you ever stop to think that the very things we are feeling insecure over are the very things we should be embracing???  The fear of how we look or our ability to do something can prevent us from living the life we were meant to live. You were created uniquely for a beautiful purpose. The Creator of the Universe is the one who knit you together in your mothers womb. Yes that’s right….the Creator of the Universe who formed the stargazing galaxies, also formed you…..freckles and all in my case!  His design is unique in everything He lays his hands on, creating one of a kind masterpieces that paint the earth on an expansive canvas. You are a “Van Gogh”  the Starry Night He took the time to cast His paint brush upon to hang on the walls of the earth.  You my dear, are a masterpiece in every way. A masterpiece that has a wonderful majestic appearance to it that was sculpted for a beautiful purpose. There is no comparing you to another because He is so talented, every single one He creates is different….not one is exactly the same.

The enemy has a way of creeping his way into our lives to make us feel like we are unworthy or not attractive enough to interfere with the very thing God desires us to be. He whispers things like “Your skin is terrible”, Your hair will never look like hers”, Your too fat or your too skinny”, “You aren’t smart enough”, “Everyone is going to laugh at you”,  “You aren’t qualified” and the list goes on and on.

1Peter 5:8 ~ Be alert and sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 

There is a spiritual battle for your soul and the enemy has his way of trying to ruin who and what you are.  He thrives on attacking anything and everything about you to put you into a state of unworthiness. His claim to fame is to ruin God’s will in your life. So if he can attack what you see in the reflection of your mirror every morning, he has a hold on you because we need to face the world in our physical appearance everyday. What the world views as beautiful is extremely short of what God views as beautiful but yet we allow the world to try and dictate what beauty is.

1 Samuel 16:7 ~ But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

If God has a will in your life…..He will give you the ability to do it. But first we need move past how we think the world views us and especially how we view our selves in this world.  I want you to grasp this and understand it with all your heart…..what the world sees and how you view yourself in the flesh, is completely different then how God sees you entirely! God sees you as His child, His creation, His masterpiece, and everything that he creates has a beautiful purpose to it. He created you in His OWN image (Genesis 1:27) You are more valuable than many sparrows (Matthew 10:31) You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). He even knows the number of hairs on your head (Matthew 10:30) God has crowned you with glory and honour (Psalms 8:5) on the last day of creation…..you were the finale. He created this world  as your temporary dwelling place, not for it to become you but for you to shine His light that is within you to others. To be set apart and lead by example, not by the ways of the world.

The bible tells us not to live for mans opinion but to live for Gods opinion…..for mans ways and thoughts are foolish, reckless, and incapable of the vastness of heaven.

1 Corinthians 2:5 ~ I did this so you would trust not in human wisdom but in the power of God.

1 Corinthians 3:19 ~ For the wisdom of this world is foolishness to God.  As the Scriptures say: “He traps the wise in the snare of their own cleverness.” 

Most of the times these insecurities pop up in our minds right before something beautiful is about to happen in our lives. Like the beginning of something new, going to a new place, meeting new people, a new job, a new adventure…..anything that is going to help you grow as a person and step outside your comfort zone.  We get so excited about the new path and then all of a sudden the freckles pop out (just like the summer time) The new adventure is the sun and the light that shines on us. The brighter the sunny adventure gets and the more we stand or move toward it…..the more prominent our freckles of insecurity can become. The evil whispers creep over us. All of a sudden we take a step back inside and away from the light because we feel everyone is going to see them or we are going to fail at the very thing that excites us.

Moving forward in life means we have to step out into the light of the world, embracing who we are, not who we aren’t. We need to let the freckles pop out and rock them! Let them become who you are,  let them shine through you and stop trying to cover them up. Remember how I said that Cover Girl foundation made my face feel tight and uncomfortable??? Well that is what happens to your being when you try to cover up your insecurities instead of embracing them! We get uncomfortable with who we are!!! We are who are we are, and just because we may be different then someone else doesn’t make us unworthy….in fact, it makes us EVEN MORE WORTHY, because we are embracing who we are meant to be and that is what changes the world. We cannot rely on what meets the eye in this world because it is distorted and it can ruin how we view ourselves, love and God. We need to dig deeper into ourselves and the desires that God has in our lives….not what the world desires!!

I will tell you this right now……if I was to give thought and care to what man was to think of me even doing this blog……I wouldn’t be doing it. But I am not doing this for the thought of those who think I can’t or see no purpose for it. I am doing it for God’s will in my life right now. Taking a step out in faith to help encourage, minister, and sew into His people so they will know how much He loves them! I am doing this due to my love for Him because He first loved me. So if I was to allow someones view of my purpose in doing this blog prevent me from doing it…..I could be robbing another of encouragement and guidance in their life.  Do you see a rippling effect here??? I am not going to lie to you…..my own insecurities definitely tried to prevent me from doing this but I ignored them, because I know that if God has this will in my life right now, He will provide me with what I need to get it done, no matter what others think of me. You are chosen, not forsaken…you are a child of God and in His house there is a place for you.

Once we shift our focus off ourselves and what we cannot do perfectly….. we begin to see purpose in our lives.  There is always going to be someone who can do something better then you, but that doesn’t mean what you have to offer doesn’t count or isn’t valuable . There is a big difference in being the best and giving our best…..we can not let the lie of not being good enough defile us. Looking for love, acceptance and worth in the wrong places will leave us empty and allow our insecurities to continue to freckle our existence. In putting our worth in what the world says is an empty promise and will leave us nothing but let down. We need to flip our focus to where our worth really is……and that is in Papa God. If we root ourselves in who He says we are, it will bring forth strength and confidence.  The awful lie that can attack us is  “IF they fully knew me, they would not fully love me.” This weakens us by the thought that we are not good enough, strong enough or smart enough to make a difference. The world will ALWAYS reject us, lie to us and neglect us. It will ALWAYS remind us of what we are not, and what it wants us to be! WELL, God says different! He says that we are already fully known and DEEPLY loved by Him no matter what!! When the world tells us what we are not, He tells us what we ARE!!!

He will stop at nothing to show you who you are in the Light of Him!  He will chase us down and meet us right where we are in the midst of our insecurities if we let Him. You need to choose what is going to drive you in this life……your problems, fears, insecurities OR your purpose???? When we allow ourselves to be fully known by God, the one who made us, we can be filled up by His love.  He looks beneath the surface of us into the depths of our hearts and brings forth the beauty in the freckles, not the shame in them. In knowing who we are in Him and through Him, we can ignore the whispers from the enemy and grasp onto that new adventure with confidence and courage from our loving Papa God.

Just because something is viewed as normal in this world doesn’t make it so. The wayward ways of this world and what we view as the normality of it, is what gives us the insecurities and worries in the first place. Don’t let your insecurities put up a road block to living an abundant life and shedding light into the world. We are not meant to blend in….you were not meant to be like anyone else but you. We aren’t meant to hide in the shadows. We are meant to shine and bring life and colour to the those around us and to this broken world.  The very things that we may feel insecure about, are the very things that could make us stand apart in this world to make a difference.  Find joy in your uniqueness and never be ashamed to shine that beautiful light of yours. Put your faith in Him and who you are in Him, NOT in the world around you.  Let Him search your heart so He can bring forth the beauty in those freckles. Embrace the delightfully, chaotic, fearfully and wonderfully made, less then perfect you!!!!

Romans 12:2 ~ Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.


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